We arrive at the Citadel and I decide to head right to the hospital to find Thane because 1. TEAM SEXY SNIPER REUNION and 2. maybe he can fill in some of what happened the last few months. I find him standing near a window just throwing some air punches, even though he gave me that fake name to find him with. Thane, I don’t need a fake name to find you hanging out in the lobby.
I walk over to him and he asks me what I’m doing here. I ummm…you emailed me. You were like “Shepard come see me!” So…so I did. Is this a trick question, Thane? I mention Kaidan’s broken ass in the hospital and he says he’ll keep an eye on him for me. We sit down and I ask Thane to come back to the Normandy PLEASE GARRUS AND I MISS YOU. He’s not gonna come along though and he also doesn’t know what I did in that drunken stupor I had been in. Well, bummer.
I continue through the hospital and find a lady arguing with a receptionist about the name of the hospital. I stare at both of them for a while. …The fuck is this conversation even…I side with the receptionist mostly because I can’t believe this other chick would waste a hospital receptionist’s time right now with bullshit like this. I don’t really feel like I know enough about whatever they’re talking about to make any sort of informed decision. I just really want them to stop and do something useful instead. Or go get drunk I don’t even care.
You know what nevermind, I’m gonna go find something else to do.
They’re still talking about cutting off this guy’s leg. Do you guys want me to do it? I have an omni-blade. One quick swipe, BAM leg’s gone. I’ll totally do it!
I head finally to Kaidan’s room where he’s talking to councilor Udina about the Spectre position they’ve offered him. Udina leaves and Kaidan says he’s still thinking about it. He’s also still apparently thinking about putting more clothes on. We talk a bit and I tell him I got him a present then hand him that bottle of whiskey I bought.
WAIT WHAT?
THAT WAS…I WANTED THAT WHISKEY. THAT WAS FOR ME.
What in the fuck, for reals.
Fine, I got another person that wanted to talk to me and SHE wanted to meet at a NIGHTCLUB.
To Aria!
I get to Purgatory and immediately check every open bar space for booze. There’s none. I am upset. I go find Aria instead then. Omega apparently got taken over by Cerberus assholes and now she’s holed up here, but she’s at least got this whoooooole couch to herself. It’s almost as good as running your own space station, right?
Aria has a sweet idea for the war though. Remember all those merc groups I used to beat up back in the day, with their different colored armors and themes? I could get THOSE GUYS to fight REAPERS for me! I gotta be honest, most of them are probably gonna die! Let’s do this!
Also in the bar is James! Guess he managed to find part of the Citadel he likes. He acts surprised to see me at the bar. Hahahahahaha, oh James. Ooooooh James. You are just too much. Of course I’m gonna be at the bar, you silly muscled-up goof, you. While I’m there, I’m buy a drink for all the soldiers because I am just the coolest Spectre ever.
After making one more pass through the bar, I find a place to dance (I apparently learned a NEW dance!) but still no place to buy a drink. So fuck this, I’ll check back later for booze.
In the meantime, I got more floors of this place to explore, so down to the docks I go…