Before I go poking at my galaxy map to find Palaven though, I stop by Traynor’s little station for a chat. She mentions that she didn’t have a chance to grab a toothbrush before leaving Earth or whatever, and I mention that we can put in orders for toothbrushes and stuff like that. She says she has a SUPER FANCY 6000 CREDIT toothbrush and I immediately tell her no, we won’t be paying for that. I need all our money for ships and fish and bigger guns.
This toothbrush is apparently some piece of work. I don’t get why she needs it so bad. My toothbrush works fine. Besides you can just get new teeth if your teeth go to shit, right? We have that technology don’t we? I got new teeth when Cerberus rebuilt me. At least, I think I did. Maybe they wanted to keep my dental records the same so they just shoved my old teeth in there. I don’t know, I didn’t ask a lot of specific questions about this.
We head to Palaven and shit is going DOWN here. There’s a giant fucking space battle going on on their moon and Liara asks if it was this bad on earth and I nod. She apologizes and I insist she not worry about. Liara, look at this. We’re all fucked. My only solace is that I’m a little drunk right now.
Cortez drops us off on the moon and Liara, James, and I pile out of the shuttle, shooting husks and clearing a path to the turian base. I pause for a second to ogle this turian soldier and then look for the commanding officer, General Corinthus. I tell him I’m here for the Primarch, and he informs me that the Primarch is dead. Well, fuck. Back to the Normandy then? Oh wait, someone else is the new Primarch and I can get that guy instead. In order to find out who that is though, we need to get a comm tower up.
But first, I wander the camp for a bit picking up random gun parts and medigel and whatever I can find. Finally I decide I should actually get to that comm tower but it needs repairs. I tell James to do it, and he tells me that tech isn’t really his specialty. Hahahaha, perfect, yes fix the thing James. Liara and I will fight off these husks while you do.
We get the tower working but it takes some time to get the information we need. In the meantime, the three of us fight off more reapers and I stand next to random turians, giving them the eye. Finally we head back to the general. He says he might have someone for me.
Not the new Primarch though.
…
IT’S GARRUS.
OH MY GOD GARRUS!
And he is looking PIMPED OUT, my god! You don’t have smashed up armor anymore and your bandage is off! Do you know what happened the last few months Garrus? I MISSED YOU.
I finally catch my breath a bit and we find out that new Primarch is this Victus guy. I ask Garrus about him, and Liara steps forward and starts answering my question. Uh, Liara? I’m trying to talk to Garrus here. I already told you, it’s not happening with us, I don’t care how much you know about turians.
I ask Garrus if he knows where Victus is but suddenly we get a call from Joker. The Normandy is going crazy, lights flickering, doors open and closing, galaxy map not even having entire solar systems on it. I send Liara back to check things out because James, Garrus, and I are going to TEAM BRO IT UP. Also James already said he doesn’t know shit about tech, and I can’t watch him be confused all the way over there.
TEAM BRO! LET’S GET THAT PRIMARCH!